Monday, August 31, 2009


I love clip art. I love even more to communicate through clip art. Take this photo for example, is this woman sleepy? Maybe but I can tell you what she is IS. She is STRESSED OUT. Head in the hands?? DEAD GIVEAWAY. And that is exactly how I am feeling and since I'm too stressed out to take a photo of myself being stressed out, she will have to do.

I'm hoping that by taking a moment from my hectic schedule to blog about being stressed, that it will actually reduce my stress. Either that or by seeing all the things listed here together is going to make my head explode. Let's give it a shot, shall we?

Things that I am stressed about:

School. Ha! Who would've thunk that by going to Graduate School while in a full-time career would cause STRESS in someones life? Tuesday's class was GREAT. Super stoked, definitely going to be the class I get the most out of (basically, it's Effective Teaching Strategies, aka Teaching 101). So I'm thinking I have the whole thing under control, excited to LEARN and be back in the classroom and then came Wednesday. Oh Wednesday and your evil Multiculturalism. I get to class and so far, digging the professor, even with her purple denim. Then she handed out the syllabus. 10 pages, single spaced, front and back. We have FIVE group projects and two individual projects, one which requires 20 hours of research and me talking to a state representative in person FOUR times. You know, because I have so much time to talk to people in power. This is on top of weekly readings and reports. Everyone had told me "Oh, Multicultural is a walk in the park. No worries!" But, OH NOES, I had to go and get THIS PERSON AS A PROFESSOR. The VP for Diversity and Inclusion?? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Somehow, I don't think she takes this subject lightly.

Burning fires' SMOKE takes over the Vegas valley. Yeah, so you know that whole California is burning thing (you ok, LISA G??) Well we are lucky enough to have all of that blowing thisaway. Yesterday, I had my patio door open so Gordon could go out and I had to close it because my whole place smelt like smoke. Then this morning, when I woke up, I could hardly breathe and have been hacking stuff up all day (I know, so attractive) and then I walked outside and my car was COVERED IN ASHES which blew inside the minute I opened the car door. Awesome. Note to self: Avoid breathing outdoors for the next OH I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG. Here is a photo my friend Effie took of today:

It doesn't usually look like that.

I am stuck in town Labor Day weekend. Ok, fair enough, not really a stress causer but could've been a stress RELIEVER. However, mine and Lobo's trip to California has been postponed until later in September.

Adult acne. I don't know if this is REALLY happening to me right now but over the past week, I have been breaking out like a 15-year-old boy. Panda thinks it may have to do with a new hair product, X thinks that it has to do with stress. But breaking out is stressing me out and IT IS A NEVER ENDING CIRCLE.

The dentist. I don't know if you know this about me, but I have been CURSED with two things in my life. The first, bad eye sight which I found out last week, just got worse. And the other, bad teeth. Not in a British kinda way but in a doesn't matter how many times a day I brush and floss (ok on the flossing, who are we kidding here??), I'm still going to get a cavity. And no, this has nothing to do with my love of candy. I went to the dentist today to find out I have several infections in my bridge area. I heard the words root canal and extraction way too many times for my taste. I go back for a full consultation next week.

Gordon. Won't stop licking his right foot and I don't know why. Which is just a cherry on top of my shit pie.

Pardon my language, I'm just a little stressed, remember?

P.S...Turns out, it was the latter and my head just exploded.

Monday, August 24, 2009


The above photo of me is from my first day of first grade. Are you wondering why there is a panda pinned to the middle of my chest area? I was, too, so I asked Pep and she said that she pinned it on me that morning and told me that if I got nervous while I was away at school, that I could rub the panda to know that she was thinking of me. She then watched as I got on the bus and never turned back.

I found this panda pin the other day while going through an old jewelry box. I'm going to wear it tomorrow. Do you know why?


That's right, HSCOOC, I'm heading back to UNLV to pursue (another) degree in teaching. If we're friends, this makes sense. Especially if we were friends when I was using my mom's grade book while writing A + with 5 stickers on your assignments.

For those of you that are like "Say wha??? I thought you did AWESOME PR WORK??" I would say, first off, I do. I do do (that ain't gonna fly in the classroom) awesome PR work but I am not sure I want to be doing awesome PR work in my 50's. And I love my job. I love the people I work for and the clients I have but would I love my job if I didn't work where I work for who I work for? IDK. And what happens when I want to blow this neon stand? It's not easy to land a PR job these days anywhere. Plus, I LOVE kids. Always have. I wanted to be a teacher when I was little but my mom told me if I wanted to make money, that wasn't the profession for me (she is a teacher). But, at 26 I've learned that I just plan on marrying rich so what does it matter (kidding) (kind of). No but srsly money isn't the most important thing. I want to shape young minds. I want every day to be different and unexpected. I want to have an impact on someones life and I don't know if grand openings at restaurants are going to do that for me. Now, I know teaching isn't a walk in the park but I do feel that it will be worth it.

Justified enough?

So tomorrow starts my first day back at school. I'm joining the Graduate Licensure Program - I know, sounds so official, doesn't it? I'm taking two classes this semester and at this rate, looks like two years from now, I'll be in the classroom as MS. KNOCH teaching first graders, all rubbing little pandas pinned to their chests.

Friday, August 21, 2009

An Open Letter to the Kings of Leon

So, since my Open Letters have worked 50% of the time (see SBC even though that is RIP now), I figured my track record is pretty good. So when the Kings of Leon concert came to an end the other night and I felt so cold, it came to me that Hey! I could just write them an Open Letter and hope for a marriage proposal out of it, so here goes....

Dear KOL,

It was an October afternoon in Denver when I first heard your sounds. I was driving the Wiz's car with Lobo in the front seat, cruising to the LoDo district. Lauren was picking out a c.d. and put in a little something called Because of the Times. As 'Knocked Up' started, Lauren said, "Ha! I bet this is Lindsay and Josh's favorite song." Then it kicked in..."I don't care what nobody says, we're gonna have a baby...." and then you started singing about coup de villes and being renegades and how your girl was always mad and usually drunk but you loved her like no other...AND I WAS IN LOVE. Every time we got in the car to go somewhere, I was in the backseat like a child saying "Can you play the baby song again, please?" We must've listened to that track 15 times in two days and I just couldn't get enough.

Lauren and I both got home and immediately purchased your album on iTunes. It was all we listened to. And let me just tell you, this was a pretty big deal because prior to that album, it had been only pop and hip-hop in my ears for a loooonnggg time. This was like being reconnected with my roots, my rock was BORN AGAIN! Then, I was watching an episode of Gossip Girl and I heard SEX ON FIRE which set ME ON FIRE. Before you could say Only By The Night, it was in my cd player and didn't come out until I started to miss Because of the Times and it has been on that same rotation for months now.

In June, while in Florida for Bookie's wedding, I got wind that you were coming to the Joint in LAS VEGAS WHERE I LIVE. As soon as I got back, I was at the Hard Rock, buying tickets and as soon as they were in my hands, I was jumping up and down with joy. It was going to happen, for sure, I was going to go to the show, you would spot me in the crowd, realize I was the one who moves you, the only one you seeeeeee and we would live happily ever after on the road, traveling the world, poppin' out some babies in between tours.

I set my Google countdown to your concert. 56 days until KOL, 37 days, 15 days....AND THEN IT WAS HERE. This was just on Wednesday. Miss Jones met me at my place at 6 p.m. and we toasted tall cans and shots of SoCo and Lime to the big night ahead of us. Stopped at In N Out, Lobo in tow and we were on our way. We arrived just in time (sorry Whigs!) for your set, found a perfect spot on the floor to dance with a clear view of you all and then the night came and took me away. For the next HOUR AND FORTY FIVE MINUTES, I was in heaven. Every song made me scream and throw my hands in the air and sing along like the obnoxious girl you all make me feel like. Love makes us do crazy, crazy things. Sure, there were songs that I would've loved to have heard you perform ('True Love Way' and 'I Want You' in case you're taking notes) but next time, KOL, next time. And for some reason, you didn't recognize me, pull me on stage and put a ring on it (yes, all four of you) but again, next time, KOL, next time.

Thursday, the day after the show, was like the worst day ever. In fact, I said it was worse than June 8th and December 26th PUT TOGETHER. Because I know the next time June 7th and Christmas come again, I do not know the next time I will get to see you perform again live. At this very moment, I am kicking myself for not buying tickets to your LA show before they sold out months ago.

So, if you read this, KOL...CALL ME NOW BABY, I'LL COME A RUNNIN'.

I love you hard,


Tuesday, August 18, 2009

3 Generations : A Trip to Pittsburgh

Two weeks ago, Pep and I packed our bags and headed to her homeland. It had been about three years since I had visited Beppee in Pittsburgh and I'm never one to turn down a trip back east.

Beppee is my grandmother. You see, she didn't want to be called Grandma (would make sense if you knew her) and I couldn't say Betty when I was little so it came out more like Beppee. And it stuck. 26 years going strong. I always tease my mom that I'm going to have her grand kids call her Peppee. She would kill me. And luckily, she looks forward to do the day that she will be called Grandma. Not, of course, until someone puts a ring on it though, as she reminds me every time I pick up a onesie in Target and start cooing.

3 generations under one roof can get very interesting, especially when you have two that are as close as my mom and I are. But I have to say, thanks to some heavy drinking - I kid, I kid (kind of) - we all got along pretty well for those four days. We spent a lot of time going through Beppee's old photos and I was fascinated by her scrapbooks and the many telegrams! I think she really enjoyed getting to show me a glimpse of her life at my age and I certainly appreciated taking the stroll down memory lane with her. She also gifted me with her sterling silver rose plated set which I will treasure until the day I die. As soon as Pep and I get it polished up, I'll have to post some pictures on here for you to see. And just in case THAT wasn't enough family history, dad got wind of my new obsession with antique items and brought me down two quilts that my great grandmother had made. They are so beautiful and the work behind them, I can't even imagine! I can barely get a button sewn back on!

My goal for the trip, other than catching up with Beppee and grabbing a beer and playing some pool with my dad, was to really document Beppee's house. My grandparents on my dad's side passed away a few years back and their house....ohhhh their house....I wish HOW I WISH I had more photographs of it. It was magnificent with sooooo much history (and ghosts, I'm not kidding, ask Andy). The best (well, depending on who you ask) thing about Beppee's house is that she keeps everything, there was enough canned goods in the basement to feed a family through the next millennium. And the can opener! OH MY. So when I wasn't drinking and playing games with family, I was taking photographs.

So here we go, Beppee's house and my Pittsburgh trip as told through pictures.

Yes, that is a caricature of yours truly at age....9 or 10 probably. Stop laughing.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Babysitter's Club: Life at 18 Months with a Tongue

I was putting this post together and picking out my favorite photos when I realized that they all feature Jordyn and her tongue. She and her tongue hanging out on the giraffe, she and her tongue reading Eclipse, she and her tongue just being cute.

But I digress.

I babysat for my favorite toddler weekend before last. Now, you should be pleased to know that she was already fed by the time I arrived. Her mom wasn't too keen on my whole new pricing plan after our last "incident". Fine by me, more time to play and watch YO GABBA GABBA.

Do you have a toddler? Do you know what Nobbin is? If not, you need to call up your local cable provider and order today. Why couldn't Yo Gabba Gabba be on when I was a toddler? Not that I don't just take it upon myself to enjoy it now and I probably would've been way too crazy about it and would've never learned to read or write and then HSCOOC wouldn't exist and OMG that would be the worst thing ever. Again, I digress. Hey, BFFs, remember these guys?

The Aquabats? YEAH THEY ARE ON YO GABBA GABBA. Hey, BFFs, remember Nathanial who likes to dance from The Soup? YEAH THAT WAS ON YO GABBA GABBA. Do you see what I MEAN??? Best show ever. Next to Gossip Girl. And Lost. So anyways, I had requested Stacy DVR some episodes of YGG for Jordyn and I to enjoy and boy, did we. We danced along with those kids all over the living room.

Afterwards, we were pretty pooped and so we took a seat on the couch. This is when Jordyn pulled out my mac book and told me "we need to talk".

I have to admit, I got pretty nervous. I was thinking, 'Ok, she could be pulling up her Facebook page to show me some boy from daycare and his current status update OR she could be pulling up the New Moon trailer since we haven't watched it together yet (but like 1,000,000 times on our own).' But do you know what she pulled up? THIS BLOG. Yeah, she went to her favorites and clicked on Heart Shaped Cut-Outs of Cheese. I was flattered we were on her favorites but knew I was about to get an ear full.
For the most part, she had very nice things to say. She liked the way I posted about our first experience together, she liked looking at the photos but she did not like the fact that I posted photos of her trying to stab me with a plastic fork. She asked me if I remembered having to eat baby food and I said "Oh, don't even go there, sister." To which she replied, "I'm just saying, maybe you could cut me a little slack."
Fair enough, little J, fair enough. I told her I was sorry, that sometimes I just write for humor and forget that little people have feelings too. Before I knew it, we were BFFs again and that is when I remembered that I brought Eclipse for us to discuss for our book club. Oh yeah, we are in a book club now together, I forgot to tell you. Hopefully, she'll be more active than her mom was in our last one (kidding, Stace, I love you!) So we discussed the third installment of the Twilight series, Team Jacob vs. Team Edward. I totally can tell she has the hots for Jacob. Look how googly-eyed she is here when I brought him up.
Afterwards, I asked her if she wanted to head to Don't Tell Mama to sing on the piano. She was all about it. So we got all ready and then just as we were putting on her shoes while sitting on the counter (TOTALLY SAFE, DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT), we hit a giggle fest...
So then we decided just to ride the giraffe instead.
I know, SO adorable. Great times, as always, just the girls hanging out on a Saturday night. This time was even more exciting since we recently found out that little Jordyn Love is going to be a BIG SISTER!!

Congrats, Stacy. So happy you're bringing another one into this world. If we're lucky, BH2 will be just like her/his big sister. With better eating habits. KIDDING, JOJO!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

The Party That Almost Killed Me

Remember when I wrote about going out on a Wednesday night? How it was hard? And Club Monster Katie comes out in like 2.5 drinks? Well, I decided to take another crack at it week before last. Yes, the alcohol has FINALLY worn off and I can now bring myself to tell you that Zappos sure knows how to throw one helluva party.

It's a Thursday night. Zappos is throwing their 10 year Anniversary/Vendor Appreciation/OMGAmazonJustBoughtUsLet'sCelebrate Party. The agency I work out is just buzzing about it while wristbands were floating around. I had already planned on going since my friend Chris was going to be in town and if we're not karaokeing (but we, I mean he) then we are drinking. Somewhere. A lot. And then I got my little hands on a few wristbands and then I called Anika and now we're really going at this full force. On a Thursday.

Anika and I arrive at Encore. I've never been here before. It's red. We get up to XS and walk in the party. Right off the bat, you can tell that just as Zappos handles business and customer service skills, they take their partying just as seriously. This is a million dollar party. There are giant hamster like balls in the pool that FOLKS, that's people just like you and me, are floating around in. PEOPLE ARE WALKING ON WATER (or at least attempting to).

I can't believe my eyes, get me a drink.

Well, kids, this is where the night went wrong. Anika and I go to the center bar at the pool. This is an OPEN BAR OF ANYTHING YOUR LITTLE ALCOHOLIC SELF CAN DREAM OF. We arrived to the party at approx. 10:15 p.m. I did not get to order my drink until 10:56 p.m. so you can imagine, when I did finally get the opportunity, that I was like "Um, can I get a jagerbomb (Jersey!) and two mojitos FOR MYSELF, thanks!" Anika substituted those mojitos for champagne and before I know it we're here.
Yes, that is Chris' head looking like it exploded in to a ray of glorious club lights.
The next day, I got to work and puked. Two days later I came down with bronchitis because I think my body shut down from trying to process the leftover alcohol.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

An Update from PA

Hello my loves. My apologies for my absence, I'm sure you've all been so concerned. Or not.

Either way, I was near death last week with a wicked case of bronchitis and then took off to visit Beppee (aka the g'ma) with Pep on Thursday and (this might surprise you), there was no Internet there.

I'm waiting to board a plane right now to head back west but some upcoming posts (my goal is to get them all up this week) include:

  • Those Zappos People Sure Can Throw a Party
  • Jordyn Love: Life at 18 Months
  • Pep and Kate Go to Pittsburgh

Lots of photos and lots of things to say so stay tuned :)